Chris the Degenerate
by WackyJaber
Summary: "Oh Sonic, how I love you. Please kiss me with your wild hedgehog lips!" - Not an actual quote from Chris that isn't even in this fanfiction. A question was asked, and a stupid answer was given. What if Chris was hardcore in love with Sonic? Read this to find out the possible truth!


**Warning:** Contains racism, bestiality, and not funny humor. Please report this shitty fanfic so that it can be purged from the site. If you're a sonic fan, or a Chris fan, then god have mercy on your soul.

I do not own, and likely never will own, these characters.

 **Chris the Degenerate**

 _Dear Sonic..._

Chris paused, sighing wistfully as he stared out the window daydreaming about his closest friend in the whole wide world, Sonic. It was so long ago since they first met, and yet it seemed so recent. He could recall even how Sonic smelled; like a rodent.

"Yo, whatcha doing you cracka ass white boy?"

Chris turned to look at his second best friend; the token black kid who he never learned the name of. Truly he was the best black friend a rich white boy could ever hope for.

"Oh, I'm just writing a letter to Sonic, token black kid."

Token black kid narrowed his eyes. "Yo, how is it after all this time you still can't remember my name? It's fucking Danny, asshole." This fell on deaf ears though because already Chris was turning a deaf ear, back into his less than platonic thoughts about Sonic. So lost was he in these thoughts that he didn't even notice that and all the other students were staring at him.

"Chris!"

's voice shocked Chris out of his state.

"Now, we all how amazing Sonic is," conceded Mr. Stuart, beginning to write again on the board today's lesson. "But I and everyone else here are getting tired of your constant bestiality lust and lust riddled sighs. The janitors has to clean the cum stains off of your seat every single day. Come on, man."

A huge blush lit Chris's face like a roman candle. The laughter of all his fellow students was the cherry on top of the humiliation pie that was his life. None of them could understand the hardships of being a rich white boy with a sexy blue hedgehog living with you. How could they? Hands shaking, he decided to ignore their verbal abuse picked up his pencil, continuing to write his shameful letter.

 _Dear Sonic…_

 _Nobody understands me like you do. I knew the moment we met that you and I were destined to be together forever. Oh, how I long to be hold in your strong glove covered hands and be taken far away from here. Then you and I could get married in the ruins of Station Square._

 _P.S. It's still kind of a dick move that you didn't stick around to help fix the place._

When he finished writing the letter he immediately and without hesitation scrunched it up into a tiny ball and swallowed it whole. Sonic could never be allowed to know how he felt about him. If he did, he'd go on a school shooting rampage before taking his own life.

After class was over and all the students were packing up their things to head home Chris's other second best friend, token girl friend, walked up to him.

"Hey Chris, can your butler give me a ride home today? My mom usually picks me up but the work piled up at her job so-"

"Can't you get black kid's Dad to give you a ride?" interrupted Chris, who was busy stuffing all of his hand drawn portraits of Sonic in compromising positions into his backpack.

"Oh come on, Chris. We both know that black kids don't have dads."

They both threw their heads up with bellowing laughter. Token black watched from the side with a sour face.

"Oh fuck both of ya'll. I do too have a Dad, and he's gonna be here in a minute. Now if you excuse me, I have to get to my locker before the police arrive with their drug sniffing dogs." Token black kid bolted out the door as quick as his pre-teen legs could carry him. This left Chris and his second best friend, the token girl, alone with each other.

"So… Chris… what are you-?"

"I'm already spoken for," said Chris, assuming she was about to confess her love to him.

She narrowed her eyes in an expression Chris could only assume was meant to show immense respect and lust before she turned and walked away. Chris let out a sigh of relief. Now he didn't have to share his limbo with a poor person. What would his parents say if they found out?

Once he had all his things packed he then proceeded outside where his asian butler was standing outside, dutifully holding his door open for him.

"Here you go, master Chris-Sama," said Mr. Tanaka.

"Thanks, second best friend," said Chris, climbing in onto that rich leather made from the pelt of an extinct species Tigers. You simply couldn't pay for a genocide that felt so good. #priceless

The very moment that Chris got home he ran up to Sonic and friends room to see if he was there. He wasn't. But what was there was a pile of his used sweaty socks. Desperately Chris fell onto his knees and buried his face into the putrid cotton fibers, breathing in that oh so delectable scent of sweaty hedgehog.

Grabbing himself a handful Chris began to devour the socks, filling his stomach to the brim. He just couldn't stop. It was a ravenous, demonic hunger! One after the other he stuffed down more of Sonic's socks until his belt buckle snapped under the strain of his extended tummy. Chris couldn't even breathe anymore as the backed up socks stacked inside of his throat.

In seconds, Chris fell over dead - his face turned blue from asphyxiation…

* * *

"... and that's how I imagine Chris will die," said Tails.

Sonic's face was entirely stoic. Knuckles was busy blowing out a marshmallow that had caught fire as all three of them sat around the fire pit. The echidna wasn't paying hardly any attention to Tail's story, but Sonic had heard it all, and by god he wish he hadn't.

"Uh, cool story, Tails…"

* * *

 ** _The_** _ **End...**_

Well thanks for giving that a read, everyone. If for some reason you actually found some amusement in that hastily written and non-proofread story then be sure to give this a review. Or heck, if you absolutely hated it and wanted me to know then give it a review anyway. I might write a second chapter, or not. Honestly I don't really know because I often write shit on a whim. I've got some retarded ideas around in my head though. So if you want to see a very unlikely but possible second chapter then go ahead and follow this.


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